Until late in the 20th century most Americans spent time with people of different generations. Now
middle-aged Americans may not keep in touch with old people until they are old themselves.
That's because we group people by age. We put our three-year-olds together in day-care centers, our
13-year-olds in schools and sport activities, and our 80-year-olds in senior citizen homes. Why?
We live far away from the old for many reasons. Young people sometimes avoid the old to get rid of
fears of aging and dying. It is much harder to watch someone we love disappear before our eyes. Sometimes
it's got hard that we stay away from the people who need us the most.
Fortunately, some of us have found our way to the old. And we have discovered that they often save
the young.
A reporter moved her family into a block filled with old people. At first her children were disappointed.
But the reporter baked banana bread for the neighbors and had her children deliver it and visit them. Soon
the children had many new friends, with whom they shared food, stories and projects. 'My children have
never been lonely,' the reporter said.
The young, in turn, save the old. Once I was in a rest home (养老院) when a visitor showed up with
a baby, she was immediately surrounded. People who hadn't gotten out of bed in a week suddenly were
ringing for a wheelchair. Even those who had seemed asleep woke up to watch the child. Babies have an
astonishing power to comfort and cure.
Grandparents are a special case. They give their grandchildren a feeling of security and continuity. As
my husband put it 'My grandparents gave me a deep sense that things would turn out right in the end.'
Grandchildren speak of attention they don't get from worried parents. 'My parents were always telling me
to hurry up, and my grandparents told me to slow down,' one friend said. A teacher told me she can tell
which pupils have relationships with grandparents: they are quieter, calmer and more trusting.